Anonymous said: Hello! I was wondering what your thoughts are on "Fifty Shades of Grey." I thought you made a post on it once, but I scoured your archive and can't seem to find it. I have a lot of friends excited over the latest movie trailer and going on about how they love the series and how they need to find a guy to do the stuff with and I'm all just, "No. That series is not a manual and just NO. Find real resources." So I was wondering your thoughts to add to my case of how 50 Shades is a Bad Thing. :D
Fifty Shades of Grey is a Very Bad Thing, because it romanticizes and eroticizes an abusive relationship while completely misrepresenting BDSM, with no acknowledgement or awareness of such from the author. It’s one thing if you want to write fantasy erotica about unhealthy relationships, but at the very least the book should include a disclaimer, and my personal opinion is that it should also include resource lists for people who want to learn about real, healthy BDSM, as well as resources on intimate partner violence.
In the BDSM scene, we’ve always had problems with both doms and subs not understanding the huge distinctions between BDSM and abuse. Every scene has its abusive, predatory doms who hang around on the fringes, waiting for naive new subs to come along who can be taken advantage of by exploiting these misunderstandings. 50 Shades made that problem a thousand times worse. Now you have new subs, mostly women, checking out the scene and straight-up expecting the kind of abuse they read about, not even realizing it’s abusive. It’s just horrifying. And let me tell you, those unscrupulous Doms out there? They know about 50 Shades, too, and they’re capitalizing on it left and right. E.L. James has a lot to answer for, if you ask me.
I got the Grand Diviner :)